Heidi Johnson-Wright

Heidi sits bolds, and very much completely naked, on a worn bench in front of a beaten piano. Heidi is loosely draped in pearls and he left hand is resting on her hip. She is gazing directly at the camera, and her dark makeup emphasizes her features. She is sitting on a leopard print fur jacket. There are stiletto boots on the floor to her right. Her electric wheelchair is in the background.

Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis

ADA Compliance Professional

When I was 8 years old, rheumatoid arthritis hijacked my entire body, from my jaw down to my toes. Over the next five years, the arthritis roared like a freight train. I lived with severe pain every day. By high school, my shoulders, hips and knees were destroyed. The summer before I turned 16 – while my friends were getting their drivers’ licenses – I had both hips replaced. After numerous orthopedic surgeries, I was able to attend college – where I met my husband — then law school. So far, I’ve had a 26-year career first as an attorney, then as an ADA compliance professional and freelance writer.

I used to think acceptance was an all-or-nothing thing: you either accepted something completely or not at all. But it’s much more complex than that. Even after I thought I’d accepted my disability, I still felt pressured to pass as non-disabled. I forced myself to walk when I should have used a wheelchair.

I tried to hide my scars. I was hesitant to let others know when I couldn’t physically do something. I felt ashamed simply for being different because different meant inferior

Acquiring my disability identity has meant traveling down a long, winding road. I’m finally at a point in my life where I accept myself, scars and all. I no longer have a 20-year-old’s waistline, yet I feel more confident and secure than I ever imagined possible. With confidence comes inner peace and contentment. With confidence comes strength.

Strength and confidence are essential to beauty. The women I’ve envied for their beauty emit both. I remember the early days of MTV when Joan Jett appeared in both skimpy bikini and boxing gloves in her “Do You Wanna Touch Me” video. She’s both a smoking-hot rock chick and a force to be reckoned with. In her “Demolition Man” video, Grace Jones, with her angular face, wide shoulders and jagged movements, is masculine-strong yet undeniably female. She’s an androgynous sex bomb, later a Bond girl who rides atop 007.

For my Bold Beauty shoot, I wanted to be as bold as a rocker chick, a punk girl challenging the establishment. I wanted to take what others might see as weakness — my disability – and turn it back on itself. Instead of shielding myself like an insecure wallflower, I wanted to stare into the camera and dare the viewer to look at me. Do you think I should cover myself to hide my scars? Then I’ll pose — clad in nothing but jewelry and eyeliner — and challenge you to look at me. I’ll show you who’s not weak.